Miley Cyrus' Autobiography

Hello all,

Allow me to warn you in advance: this post will not be pleasant.

It has been brought to my attention that Miley Cyrus has (or is) writing an autobiography. May I be the first to say WTF?!?!?!?! The is 16 years old, stars as a 13 year old on a television show for 8 year olds... what does she have to write about? "Oh... today on the set I dropped my hairbrush. It was mortifying!"

I have read interviews and seen her on tv, this girl was obviously thrust into the spotlight far too early in life. An interviewer from Seventeen magazine did an interview with Cyrus and said: "You're very mature for your age!" To which Miss Cyrus responds: "I know." Did your parents ever teach you to be humble?! You say "Thank you!" when someone compliments you.

On top of her lack of modesty have you seen that photo running around? Yeah, I mean the one right next to this. Was she even 16 when this was taken? This is wrong. Have some class! Put a shirt on! It's not that hard.

Then, while I was looking for this photo I found another one, featured below. I realise that the self-respect rate of teenage girls has gone down but this is revolting. She is in the limelight, so she should at least act like it. She is doing nothing but embarrasing herself in my opinion.

I am not famous. I'm not even particularly religious! But I can say with complete confidence that I don't go parading my bare body through the proverbial town square! Where's your self-respect? You're mentoring 8 year olds, is this how we want them to grow up??

Back to this autobiography, I was going to gripe about. I read a few exerpts from the wonderful Interweb and I am horrified. I know what she spent all this time writing about! Her failed love with Nick Jonas. Needless to say, I find the Jonas Brothers justa s insuffereable as Miss Cyrus herself.

An exerpt for you:
In the beginning, we'd play basketball in my backyard, or play Nintendo at his place. His family always made yummy Italian food for dinner. I love to ride my bike, and he would walk along next to me as I rode, singing "My Girl." But instead of "My Girl," he'd sing "Miley, talkin' bout Miley." Wow! I was so in love. Do you know what i'm talking about? The kind of love where the sun could shine or not shine all day long and you wouldn't care. The kind of love that makes you want to jump in the pool in December. The kind of love that makes you want to dance in the rain. (Who am I kidding? This is L.A. It never rains!) This was the most magical journey of my life and it was a total rush.

Now, regardless of the fact that she used the terms "Do you know what I'm talking about?" and "Who am I kidding?" this was terrible. You are 16 and your talking about the kind of love that makes you want to jump into a pool in December. Some may say I am bitter because I've never had a boyfriend. That might be true, but if I had the conundrum of having to spend the rest of my life with one of the Jonas Brothers I'd hang myself from the nearest rafter! But in her case this "love" cannot be true. Are they still together? No. It couldn't have been that great for both of them if they're split now.

I will stop now before I get into how bad of a singer she is. She's obviously trying that old sex appeal trick in her videos... No. I promised I would stop. Enough starlet bashing for today. She is young, and should not be publishing a memoir. My god... wait until you have something besides a fluffy teenage romance to write about.

Good day, all. Hope any of you who managed to read this all the way through are not mortified at how much hatred someone of my shyness level can hold.

Yours,
Allie